Britain's Not Insane!
by Laveycee
Summary: Basically, Britain sets out to prove that magic is real. Slightly longer summary inside. USUK, GerIta, more pairings to be announced. Contains yaoi, which will be in the story, but probably not a lot. T to allow for language and for paranoia.
1. Chapter 1

Summary: _After being told (again) that magic doesn't exist, Britain set out to prove them all wrong. With magic. And time-travel. Yes, he's finally had it. _

Me: Hi, peoples!

Spock: Hello. And I will remind you that "peoples" is not proper English.

Me: Oh, come on, nobody cares about that. Unless they're English teachers or boring old stick-in-the-muds like Britain. ...Especially when he's talking to America.

Spock: ...Speaking of which, this is your first Hetalia fanfiction, is it not?

Me: Yep! It'll be fun to write~!

Spock: But it's a cross-over.

Me: Obviously. Harry Potter and Hetalia belong together!

Spock: Are you missing something?

Me: Oh, yeah! The disclaimer! C'mere, Disclaimer! *gives doggie treat*

Disclaimer: Laveycee does not own Harry Potter, Hetalia: Axis Powers (or World Series or...what's season five? The Beautiful World, right?), or Spock. No matter how much she wants to.

Me: By the way, Hetalia does make fun of every country. Just so you know... And I refer to England as Britain, just to spread the insults around. ...This might be USUK/UKUS (let's put it this way: it might be Britain/America), and most likely GerIta, because they're so cute together! *squeals* But romance will definitely take a back seat in this fic. Oh, and I can't really write accents. I might use a turn of phrase or have them say something in their native language, but for the most part it's 100% English and accented in whatever the voice inside your head is reading this in.

* * *

"ALRIGHT! Let's get this meeting started, y'all!" America started out this world meeting as any other-yelling, no matter that it was technically Britain's turn to start the meeting, seeing as the conference was being held in London.

"Do shut up, America," Britain said, already partially annoyed at the American's enthusiasm at...everything.

"DON'T TELL THE HERO TO SHUT UP!" America yelled back.

Britain opened his mouth to retaliate, but before he could make a sound, Germany decided to intervene in his usual gentle way. "EVERYONE SHUT UP!" he roared. All noise in the room immediately ceased. "That's better," he looked at all of them, slightly curious about why they all shut up the instant he asked. Or yelled, rather. He wasn't that scary...was he? "Britain, the floor is yours," Germany told him, sitting down.

Britain stood up and walked over to the podium. "Good afternoon, everyone. I trust that you are all enjoying your stay in London?"

"Actually-" France began, but was quickly given a death glare from Britain. Unfortunately France knew that look. It was the one that meant "shut up, frog".

"Very good. Our first topic this conference is global warming. Obviously we can't stop it, but we may be able to slow it down. I came up with two options: firstly, we could somehow manage to switch from using fossil fuels for everything to using solar power. Now, this would be very difficult to do, seeing as how much money this would cost all of us, and we would also have to convince our bosses, and I know how much they listen to us." There were murmurs of agreement from most of the countries, except for Romano (who just isn't a very happy person), and France (because, well... Britain suggested it).

"Our second option," Britain continued, "is my personal favorite. There is a spell-"

"For the last time, Britain, magic doesn't exist!" America called. Nobody argued, except for Britain.

"It does so exist!" he huffed, slightly upset at America's easy dismissal of something that was important to him. "One of the best magical schools, Hogwa-"

America rolled his eyes and walked over to the podium. "Iggy," he said gently, "that's in Harry Potter. It's not real. Trust me, lots of my citizens wish that it was-they think that it'd be incredibly cool to go to for school instead of a boring regular school-but it doesn't exist." In a more normal voice (for America, that is), he added, "I think all those fairy tales have gone to your head!"

Britain stared at him, almost ready to cry. "What if I proved it to you?" he asked. "What if I could prove it to all of you?"

France was the first to respond. "_Oui_, then we'd believe you. But since you can't prove it, we don't have to believe you," he laughed.

"Then I'll prove it to you." Britain's eyes were bright. He knew what spell to use: _Reverto Tempus_ (1). It'd be perfect and would do just what he wanted.

After that, the meeting went without a hitch (unless you counted America's insistance that yes, a gigantic hero would be perfect to stop global warming. When was he going to stop suggesting that?!).

"Alright, everyone, come back here at nine a.m. tomorrow. The hotel I booked is just around the corner, 123 Whitehall Court (2). Your rooms are booked under your human names, remember that. There are two to a room, siblings are with each other, please don't cause World War III, as that would be very messy and preferably avoidable, that is why we have these conferences." Britain paused briefly. "Please be on time to the meeting tomorrow. And Frog, please don't try to seduce any of my citizens again. Your decision to flirt with the Prime Minister's daughter (3) was ill-advised and hard to explain to him. Although I do love that picture of her beating you up..." he trailed off, a faraway look in his eyes. "Anyway, good day to you all! America," he added more quietly, "would you like to...to go to dinner with me?" As much as Britain tried to hide it, he was terrified that America would either decline or worse, make fun of him.

"Sure! As long as you don't cook!" America told him with a laugh.

"My food isn't that bad!" Britain said indignantly.

"I never said that your food was bad! I said that your cooking's bad!" America grinned.

Britain started sputtering. _I did set myself up for that, didn't I?_ he thought. His face turned a bright red when America casually slung his arm around his shoulders.

"So...what're we eatin'?" America asked.

"Er...we could get some fish and chips from one of the shops (4) and walk around Hyde Park, I suppose..." Britain trailed off, glancing at America's face.

"Sounds great, dude! Let's just stop by the hotel so I can change into something more comfortable, alright?" Britain's mind was in overdrive. Did this seemingly innocent phrase mean someting else entirely? If he was honest with himself, it wasn't likely.

"Alright, let's go." The duo walked out of the building, saying "hi" to all the workers going in, out, and wandering around. "Come on, it's this way," Britain said, grabbing America's hand and tugging him in the right direction.

"Arthur-" Britain jumped a little at the sound of his human name- "I'm not entirely lost. I do have a sense of direction, dude!" America laughed again.

After a few minutes of walking, they reached the Lotus Hotel (5) and walked in. Leaving Britain at the door, America approached the front desk. "Excuse me," he said, surprisingly quietly and politely, "but I have a reservation under Alfred F. Jones?"

"Oh, yes, sir, welcome to the Lotus Hotel. Your luggage has been brought up to room 76. You're sharing with...Matthew Williams? It was a dual reservation under both of your names, am I right?" the clerk-her nametag read "Amelia"-asked, sounding respectful of the hotel's guests' hypothetical sexual preferances.

"Oh, my bro's already here? Awesome! Yeah, we're sharing a room. Could I have a key for the room, please?" America's usual zest for life had leaked through slightly, but he still sounded polite enough for most people-maybe not Austria, but polite enough for Amelia the Clerk and Britain.

"Here's your room key, sir, and breakfast is served from six-thirty a.m. to ten a.m. and is not served on Sundays. Have a wonderful stay." With that, America said goodbye and walked back to Britain.

"Come on, Iggy! Let's go up to the room so I can get changed-and we can say hi to Ca-uh, Mattie!" In America's haste to speak, he almost slipped up and called Canada by his country name instead of his human name.

Britain turned red. "Y-you want me to go to y-your room with you so you can get c-changed?!"

"What's wrong? We're both guys, and it'd be better than just leaving you down here to wait. If it makes you feel any better we could both go up and I could get changed in the bathroom," America told him, slightly confused as to why Britain thought it was such a big deal.

"Alright..." Britain said, still not entirely comfortable with the situation.

America started walking towards the elevator.

"Aren't you going to take the stairs?" Britain called after him.

"The room's on the seventh floor-no way are we walking up that many flights of stairs, dude! It'd take too long to get to!" America pointed out. After that, Britain silently walked after America.

* * *

~~Time Warp! At the Hotel room~~

* * *

America slid the key in and opened the door to reveal Canada at the desk typing something on a laptop.

"S'up, Canadia?!" At the sound of America's loud voice, Canada jumped.

"Oh, it's you, America," he said, relieved. "And my name is-"

"Canada, I know, dude! It's just so much fun to mess with you!"

Canada facepalmed. "Hello, Britain," he said.

"Hello, Canada. What are you working on?" Britain asked, peering at the laptop's screen.

"Just some report my boss wants. It's nothing too exciting," Canada shrugged.

As the two had been talking, America had gone over to his suitcase and pulled out some "casual clothes"-a t-shirt, a pair of jeans, and some sneakers; of course, he'd also have his beloved bomber jacket with him!-and gone into the bathroom to change. America emerged from the bathroom and glanced over at them. _Still talking...this'd be a good chance to mess with Iggy... What if I- yeah. _A grin spread over America's face.

"Well, at least your boss isn't forcing you to spend more time with America. 'Spend more time with your brother. It'll be good for both of you!' he says. If it's good for the both of us, why doesn't he do it? I love my brother, but sometimes he's just..." Canada trailed off.

"Overbearing?" Britain suggested. "Over-enthustiastic? Too energetic?"

"All of those," Canada sighed. "But I do love him. I don't want anyone else to be my brother, even if he does sometimes forget me...and is loud enough to drown me out..."

Britain opened his mouth to tell Canada that it'd get better, when he yelped because of a sudden hand squeezing his shoulder almost painfully hard. "America, what are you- Oh my God!"

* * *

(1) Reverto Tempus (Britain's spell): Literally "back in time". Seriously, that's what I put in Google Translate! **(Edit {2} at bottom)**

(2) 123 Whitehall Court: London's United Nations office is at 3 Whitehall Court, and I did try to look up hotels near there, but I kept getting hotels in New York, America, unfortunately.

(3) The Prime Minister's daughter: I have no idea whether or not the British Prime Minister has a daughter, and quite honestly I don't really care. Sorry to all Brits who do care, and if the Prime Minister has a daughter it'd be awesome if you told me because, well, knowledge is power!

(4) Fish and chips from street vendors: Um, well...I have a craving for fish and chips, and in my mind London has street vendors selling fish and chips randomly through the city. I've never been to London, but I do want to go someday, so if any Londoners are out there-or if you've ever been to London-and you can either correct me or confirm this, that'd be much appreciated.

(5) The Lotus Hotel: This is from Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief. It's also a casino (if you're in Vegas, anyway).

Me: Well, I'm leaving the first chapter on a cliffhanger. Sorry?

Spock: She isn't really sorry.

Me: Eh, I'm not really. Anyway, if you guys want to see any other pairings, just ask me. I can do one-sided if you want. For example, if someone wanted FrUK, I could have France liking Britain, but Britain just being kinda creeped out. If you want a pairing, please PM me or review, and tell me why you think that the pairing works. For example, USUK has the "Special Relationship", and, well, why do you think that Britain gets so worked up over things that America does?

Spock: In any case, we are accepting pairings. Except for the Harry Potter 'verse-all pairings will be canon. All. Of. Them.

Me: Anyway, reviews are appreciated!

**Edit: Thank you to ILiveNearLondon for the information that you have to go to a shop for fish in chips in London. And that the real Prime Minister has a two-year-old daughter. Therefore the Prime Minister is now the one from ****Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince****. You know, the one who's freaked out by Fudge? Well, he magically got a teenage daughter because I said so. And I'll give him a name at some point...**

**Edit 2: Thank you to whonada-chan for the proper translation of the spell-I give up on Google Translate; it needs to look at the big picture!**


	2. Chapter 2

Me: Review Replies~!

MsMerlein: I'm glad that you like it. And I know that Iggy's not insane, and you know that, but what would you think if you knew that someone thought that magic was real-and claimed to see magic creatures? You'd think that they were insane too!

ILiveNearLondon: Thanks for the info. I'll see what I can do to change the fish and chips thing... And let's just prentend that the Prime Minister... um, let's go with "he's the Prime Minister from Harry Potter who suddenly and randomly got a teenage daughter". So, not the real Prime Minister (although I'm sure that the current British Prime Minister is a wonderful person, but he's just not suitable for this story).

Me: I'm glad that everyone seems to be enjoying this, judging from the amount of reviews, favorites, and follows I've gotten over the last few days-thank you all so much!

Spock: She's been very excited.

Me: Anyway, this chapter would have been finished sooner, but I had homework. (Why can't school just go away?)

Spock: It's important.

Me: And annoying. Anyway, Disclaimer!

Disclaimer: Laveycee still owns nothing. Except for the laptop. And possibly the idea that will crop up later in the story. But she doesn't know.

Spock: *feeds Disclaimer dog food*

Me: What? You thought that we only fed poor Disclaimer doggie treats? That'd be inhumane-not to mention how fat he'd get!

* * *

Last time: _Britain opened his mouth to tell Canada that it'd get better, when he yelped because of a sudden hand squeezing his shoulder almost painfully hard. "America, what are you- Oh my God!"_

* * *

Britain stared in horror at the...the _blue_-or was it purple?-hand that gripped his shoulder. His gaze then traveled up to see the creature's face, a bluish-purple color with...blood dripping from it (1) and horrible white eyes. "A-america?"

The creature grinned. "Hello, Britain..." the creature said in a voice straight out of a horror game.

Britain and Canada shrieked. The creature started laughing. "Haha, you should've seen your faces!" The creature walked over to the bathroom and retrieved a damp washcloth. Bouncing back over, he started to wipe off the makeup to reveal America.

"You git! You seriously scared us!" Britain yelled, looking ready to pass out.

"Sorry, dude, but I couldn't resist!" America was about to say more, but was interrupted by pounding on the door. Canada got up and rushed to answer it before the door was knocked off its hinges.

"We...heard...screams," Germany panted.

"Ve~ (2) We came as fast as possible!" Italy piped up. "H-hey...who opened the door?"

Canada sighed. Making an effort to speak more loudly, he said, "I did. America just scared us-I think that he was trying to scare Britain more, though."

"Sorry, Canada, I didn't see you there!" Italy said apologetically.

"It's okay," Canada said awkwardly.

"We are sorry, though. And please tell America to stop trying to scare people; he's only going to scare himself. Or someone else will when they retaliate against him..." Germany trailed off. "See you tomorrow at the conference. _Gute Nacht_." (Good night.)

"Good night, Germany. Good night, Italy," Canada said quickly, then closed the door on the duo's retreating backs.

"If you wouldn't get so scared about nothing-"

"It was only a joke, I didn't mean to scare you so badly-"

"Scared? Ha! I wasn't scared-"

"I wish that you could have seen your face, it was hilarious-"

"Stupid America, always trying to argue with everyone-"

Canada sighed. Then, thinking quickly, he went back to the door. "Germany, could you help me out, please?" he called.

"Hm? Oh, _ja_, sure. What do you-ah. Of course I can help," Germany said upon seeing the two aruing countries. "SHUT UP!" he roared.

America and Britain froze. "Germany?" Britain asked. "Why are you-"

"I heard shrieking and came to see what was the matter. Then Canada asked me to get you two to stop fighting." _Honestly, when are these two going to give in? If they don't see that they both like each other soon, we're going to have to use France's plan,_ Germany grumbled to himself.

"Sorry, that was..." Britain began.

"Childish and uncalled for? From both of us," America added hastily, not wanting to get into another fight with his friend.

Britain turned a scowl onto America, grumbling something to the extent of "chooses _now_ to behave like an adult..." America just smiled back obliviously.

"Well," Germany said, now slightly uncomfortable, "I should go to check on Italy and Prussia-you know how he gets sometimes..." Recieving murmurs of understanding, Germany beat a hasty retreat-but not like Italy's retreat; his was calmer and slightly more sedate.

* * *

~~Time Skip: To the Lobby!~~

* * *

After bidding farewell to Canadia, Britain and America made their way to the hotel lobby, neither talking to the other.

America glanced at Britain. What was his problem? Why couldn't they get along? It seemed that every time they were near each other they ended up fighting, and he hated it. It felt like the Revolution (5) all over again-and that was like a thousand years ago, dammit!

"Britain?" America finally asked hesitantly.

Britain glanced at America briefly. "What?" he asked in a rather clipped tone of voice.

"Sorry," America said simply.

Britain stopped and turned around, fully facing America. "Sorry for what?"

"Every time we're close to each other we end up fighting. It's both our faults, but..." he trailed off.

Britain sighed. "We are both to blame. I shouldn't let your actions or your comments get to me." He started to add something else, but was cut off by America.

"I'm sorry about scaring you...but it was a good opportunity. Shouldn't've done that..." he mumbled to himself.

"It's okay. Why don't we go to a shop to get something to eat and wander around a park for a few hours?"

America nodded. "I'm still sorry, though."

_As am I, _Britain thought. _As am I._

* * *

~~Little bitty time jump: To the Park! Come along, Patsy!~~

* * *

Feeling a bit full after eating-or, in the case of America, shoveling everything into his mouth as though it was going to be taken away from him-the duo wandered to St. James's Park Lake (6) and sat on a bench near the water, in peaceful silence.

After a while, America broke the silence. "So... How're ya going to try to prove that magic is real?"

Britain hadn't really planned on revealing his "plot" until the meeting in the morning, but decided that telling America the name of the spell wouldn't hurt. "I'm planning on using a spell called _Reverto Tempus _(7). As for what it does," Britain smirked, "You'll have to wait until tomorrow to find out."

"Fair enough. _Reverto Tempus _..." America mused. "Sounds Latin-y... What's it mean?"

"You'll find out tomorrow." Watching the sun go down, they began to walk back to the hotel.

* * *

~~Tiny time skip: To the hotel!~~

* * *

"Goodnight, Britain," America said, grabbing the unsuspecting nation in a hug.

"G-ood-n-_ight_, America!" Britain managed to gasp out from the crushing hug.

"Sorry, dude!" America said hurriedly, releasing Britain. "I'll see ya at the meeting tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow." With that, Britain turned to start walking home. He had a lot of preparing to do for tomorrow.

* * *

(1) America's blue-purple face with blood dripping from it: Remember the episode where Japan gave America horror video games to try to toughen him up so he wouldn't freak at "scary" movies? Well, America did something and made himself look like a zombie from one of the games and freaked out Japan (poor guy). In my head canon, America saw a future opportunity to freak out Britain. There's the opportunity, America took it. Britain calls it a creature because, well...what else would you call it?!

(2) Ve~: As far as I can tell, Italy says this a lot. It's like his catchphrase or something, but it's really fun to write!

(3) "H-hey...who opened the door?" -Italy: I couldn't resist. Sorry, Canada and Canadians, but it was too good of an opportunity! I'm so ashamed of myself, doing that to you... Can you forgive me?

(4) Canadia: I'm sorry, Canadians. it's just so much fun to write/say "Canadia" instead of "Canada"! I don't know why, but it is!

(5) The Revolution: Where I'm from, people alternate between calling it "the Revolutionary War" and "the War of/for Independance". (If it's not clear, it's the American Revolution.)

(6) St. James's Park Lake: It was chosen for the simple reason that it was close to Whitehall Court, and it had a lake, which isn't really important but I do like lakes.

(7) _Reverto Tempus _: Remember, this means "back in time" in Latin. According to Google Translate, anyway.

Me: Today is the anniversary of the 1st United Nations meeting, so that's one reason why this chapter wasn't put up sooner. Congratulations to the UN for being more successful than the League of Nations!

Spock: It isn't that hard to be more successful than the League of Nations.

Me: Yeah, well, it's the concept of the thing. Uh...why do I feel like I'm forgetting something?

Spock: The accents thing?

Me: Oh, yeah, that's right! So, you know how everyone in the world has a different accent, right? Well, what I'm interested in is what do people in other countries think of different accents. Like, what do the French think of American accents, or what do Americans think of Russian accents. So, if you'd put what you think of any other accent-like, the British (specifically the English) sound very sophisticated and refined to me, an American-that'd be great. (It's also a nod to the United Nations. And Hetalia.)

Spock: Now, we will ask you to kindly participate.

Me: Also, hi to everyone who's reading this! I think that it's awesome that there are people all over the globe reading my story-it's mindblowing, actually!

**Edit: Another thank-you to whonada-chan for the proper translation of the spell. Don't do Google Translate, kids!**

Review?


	3. Chapter 3

Guest Reviews~:

ILiveNearLondon: Glad to know that I don't have to worry about offence. And I wasn't sure what you meant by "posh", so I looked it up-did you mean to use it in a way that means "snobby"? That's what I was assuming, anyway. Anywho, you are now my bestest friend because I know practically nothing about London. Unless I bug my cousin, and I really don't wanna bother her all the time... So I'm very happy that you read this!

whonada-chan: Thanks for the translation-by the time this chapter is up that should be fixed. And this is embarrassing-I'm still in the process of learning German, but I should've caught that! *headdesk* Then again, I have trouble with the Akkusativ and Dativ cases. As in, I struggle with the "der" to "den" and the like. It drives me nuts. And...I'm rambling. Just ignore me.

Me: Thank you all for following, reviewing, favoriting, or just reading-and hopefully everyone's in character. More or less... Anyway, after this chapters may take a bit longer to get out.

Spock: Because Laveycee has discovered the British show known as "Doctor Who".

Me: What? There's nothing wrong with liking Doctor Who!

Spock: Humans...

Me: Ah, forget it. C'mere, Disclaimer!

Disclaimer: Laveycee owns nothing but hypothetically this idea. (Though she wouldn't mind being given either the rights to Harry Potter or Hetalia.)

Me: Story time.

* * *

Last time: _"See you tomorrow." With that, Britain turned to start walking home. He had a lot of preparing to do for tomorrow._

* * *

"Where's that bloody spellbook got to?" Britain mumbled to himself, digging through a box full of miscellanious items. "No, that's not it, no, why do I even have that? Nope, broken, junk, how did that get here?" He tossed a French flag (1) over his shoulder and it hit the ground, sending up a small plume of dust. "Ah, here we are." Britain lifted out a book bound in worn brown leather with brass clasps and the title, Traveling, (2) written in a beautiful golden script.

Britain opened the book and started flipping the pages. "Future, alternate universe... Why didn't anyone think to put an index in this thing?" he grumbled to nobody in particular. "Ah, here we are. _Reverto Tempus_. To go back I'll need... That's...interesting." He glanced at the list of items necessary.

_Pentagram_

_Item from time period_

_Time Dust (3)_

_Small vial of blood of travelers_

Britain read the last necessary ingredient, frowning to himself. How was he going to get everyone to agree to having blood drawn? _Seeing as none of them believes in magic, they won't,_ Britain realized. Even America-hell, even France, who had known him since they were both tiny-wouldn't let him take their blood. How was he going to convince them? _Don't worry about that now,_ Britain chided himself. Best to get everything else ready before crossing the "get-the-blood-to-finish-the-spell" bridge. Metaphorically speaking.

"Time Dust... Isn't that in- Yes, it is! Thank God I kept one! Where did I put it?" Britain looked around for the Time Turner he had recieved from a Minister of Magic years and years ago-right around the time they had managed to create a working Time Turner, as a matter of fact. Nothing, nothing, nothing, a glimmer of gold, nothing, not-wait. Britain glanced back to where the glint of golden light had been. It was on the bookshelf, in front of... The Many Mysteries of Time (4). That's where he had left it, of course!

As for the pentagram-well, he'd just have to bring some chalk to make it...probably on the conference room's floor. The item from the time period... What could he use? He had no flags from that time, he didn't really have anything from that time! But...

"Well," Britain sighed, "he does owe me a favor."

* * *

(1) the French flag in Britain's basement: Why not? Maybe France put it there to mess with Britain at some point but never did anything. If anyone wants to write a story about that, feel free to, but tell me so I can read it, please!

(2) the spellbook called Traveling: Not based off of any other book. It contains spells that allow you to go forward and back in time, and anywhere in the universe. Think "Britain's personal TARDIS in book form". This is the only surviving copy. The others were destroyed during the London Blitz. (Sorry if this is a painful topic for anyone.)

(3) Time Dust: I'm making this up, by the way. So, you need Time Dust to use in Time Turners. Without this rare dust, all you have is a fancy necklace with an hourglass on it.

(4) The Many Mysteries of Time: It sounds good, doesn't it? And if such a book does exist, I don't own it.

* * *

Me: Ooh, who owes Britain a favor?

Spock: You're the author of this fiction, don't you know?

Me: Yes, but this way it'll give people something to think about!

Spock: You...do have a point.

Me: Says Mr. Pointy-Ears.

Spock: ...

Me: Look at it this way: I'm not calling you the Doctor.

Spock: That doesn't make any sense.

Me: Because you haven't watched the show. By the way, anybody know why the Doctor was called Mr. Spock at one point? At least, I think that was what Rose called him in front of Jack Harkness...

Spock: Let's move on.

Me: Okay. Review, and sorry for this chapter being so short-hopefully I'll have another chapter ready to be uploaded next Friday. Not this Friday, but the one after that. The second of February. Okay? Sound good? If it doesn't...well, too bad. That may have sounded a bit mean... Ah, well, that's life. And sorry that this is a helluva lot shorter than the first two chapters... Just the way I wanted it to end. Bye!


	4. Chapter 4

Replies to Reviews~:

whonada-chan: You're right, Time Dust does sound like something out of Doctor Who. Didn't realize that before. That's hilarious. I'm not quite sure if I want to explain Time Dust or leave it to your imaginations, because what I come up with might not be...I don't know, as _interesting_ as what someone else might come up with. And don't apologize for nitpicking-it's how people improve in life in general.

ILiveNearLondon: Sounds like how some Americans feel about President Obama (not trying to offend anyone, just for the record, simply stating a fact). There might be some Americans who use the word "posh", but it's not something that you would hear over here very often. And yeah, I know that the "British accent" is nonexistant, but in general, Americans love the accents from that general area. And yeah, the slang is different all around the world (and can be pretty confusing). For example, I just recently learned that a "thong" is very, very different in Australia than it is in the U.S. Apparently in Australia it means a shoe. In America... well, it's very different. Let's leave it at that.

Me: Well, thank you all for reviews, follows, or favorites-oh, thank you for just reading!

Disclaimer: *Laveycee owns almost nothing.*

* * *

Last time: _"Well," Britain sighed, "he does owe me a favor."_

* * *

Britain shifted his weight from his left leg to his right awkwardly. This was definitely not his first choice of who to go to for something from 1995. Anyone else-except the frog, of course-would have been better.

The door opened a crack. "What do you want?" asked the voice of ex-Minister Cornelius Fudge.

"Hello, Mr. Fudge. I don't know if you recognize me, but-" Britain was cut off.

"_You!_" spat Fudge. "You could've helped me stay in office, you know! Supported me and he-"

"No, I couldn't have," Britain said coolly. "I have more influence with the Muggle Ministry, and even my power there is very limited-I am merely on the payroll as a counsellor to the Prime Minister. (1) As far as the Ministry of Magic is concerned, I am nobody."

What was visible of Fudge's face gaped. "May I come in, by the way?" Britain asked. "It's rather rude to leave a guest outside, you know." Without waiting for Fudge to respond, he pushed past the dumbstruck man and into the foyer of the rather large house. (2) Britain gazed around the room. It was richly decorated with gold trimmings and portraits of whom he assumed were ancestors. "Why don't we go into the parlor and you can request a house elf (3) to bring us some tea?"

"L-look here, I don't know what power you hold over the Muggle Minister, but you can't just barge in here demanding tea! Furthermore, you weren't exactly doing a great job during the war, were you? Where were you when you were n-"

"_Shut up_," Britain hissed, leaning foward, green eyes blazing with anger. "The war was not my fault-I can't be expected to tell my citizens what to think, no matter what you may think! Or not think, as it may be," Britain amended.

Fudge bristled. "Who're you to tell me to shut up?!"

"I am," Britain growled, "the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, and I require your...help." Britain waited for Fudge's response-would he freak out or calmly accept it?

"What do you mean, you're the United Kindgom?" Fudge asked, eyes narrowed.

"Exactly what I said. I am the personification of the United Kingdom-I'm usually known as 'Britain' or 'England', however, you may call me 'Arthur'. Or 'Mr. Kirkland', depending on how formal you want to be," Britain told him, not bothering to go into any more detail; Fudge was no longer one of his bosses anymore, and had never shown any interest in who-or what, rather-Britain was, so why should he explain now? "And I need something from you."

"Aren't you going to-" Fudge began.

"No," Britain said simply. "And my answer will not change."

"Fine. What-" Britain could tell that Fudge was forcing himself to remain calm and not yell-"do you need?"

"In the year 1995, the Ministry created several Decrees for Education and posted them at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, did it not?"

"Yes," Fudge said slowly.

"Do you still possess the original parchment they were printed on?"

"Yes..."

"May I have them?"

"Y-wait, what?! What the hell do you need those for?!" Fudge demanded loudly.

"I need them to prove something to my...colleagues," Britain said carefully.

"Why do you need to prove anything to them? If they don't believe you about something, they don't believe you about something. Wait-" Fudge's eyes widened- "they aren't Muggles, are they? You can't expose magic to Muggles, Kirkland! You should know that!"

"No need to worry, Mr. Fudge. My colleagues are not Muggles."

"Then why do you need an original Decree? Why not just look one up in the Archives with them?"

"I do not need to explain myself to you. Will you or will you not help me?"

"What will you do for me?" Fudge asked-there was no way that he was just going to randomly help some person.

"I won't tell anyone about your former Senior Undersecretary Dolores Umbridge's...collection of your...personal items." (4)

Fudge's face pales. "How-how did you-"

"I know lots of things, Mr. Fudge. Now, will you help me?"

"I... Fine. Which one do you want?" Fudge grumbled, disliking that he was at the mercy of some lunatic.

"I want the Decree that declared Dolores Umbridge High Inquisitor of Hogwarts," Britain told him.

"Number twenty-three," Fudge mumbled. "Yes, I think I have it... Follow me."

Britain and Fudge went to the basement where there were several filing cabinets. "I want Educational Decree Number Twenty-three," Fudge announced.

Suddenly a filing cabinet drawer flew open and some invisible force started rifling through it. Then, a slightly worn piece of parchment floated over to Fudge, who waved it over towards Britain.

"Thank you, Mr. Fudge. I should probably go now..." Britain waited for Fudge to show him out. "Ah, could you show me the way out?" Britain prompted.

"Follow me," Fudge said curtly, striding out of the room and into the front hallway. "Goodbye."

"Thank you for your time. Goodbye, Mr. Fudge." With that, Britain walked out. It was around ten p.m., and he had to be at the meeting around eight a.m. to get the spell prepared.

* * *

(1) Counsellor to the Prime Minister: Somehow I get the feeling that the nations are working for their governments, but they can only advise their bosses (however, said boss may or may not listen).

(2) Fudge's "rather large house": I see the job of Minister of/for Magic as paying very well, and Fudge seems to be the type of person who would flaunt that money to everyone-like, "Look at me! I'm important~!"

(3) House elf policy: I think that while in the Wizarding World, Britain is more-or-less accepting of the treatment of house elves, but agrees with Hermione Granger that they deserve equal rights-but he can't actively participate.

(4) Dolores' collection of Fudge's "personal items": I have no idea, but it sounds like something she'd do-she was kinda stalkery and obsessed with Fudge.

* * *

Me: Aaand... the meeting and spell will be in the next chapter. Yeah, it's being kinda-sorta-

Spock: That's not a word.

Me: Shh. Didn't your mother ever tell you it's rude to interrupt? Anyway, this is being drug out a little, but I think it'll be worth it in the long run. Hopefully.

Spock: Go work on the next chapter.

Me: Don't tell me what to do. Anyway, next chapter might be up this weekend, because I finished this chapter sooner than expected. See y'all later!

Spock: Goodbye.

Me: P.S. Is anyone else having freaky weather? Cuz it's all warm and humid here (which isn't that odd, but the warmth and the ton of rain at this time of year is...), which is just not right in the St. Louis area in January. It should be freezing here. I blame global warming.

Spock: P.P.S. This chapter wasn't very long either. We are quite sorry, but it was...unavoidable. Laveycee ended it at what seemed to be the logical place for her.


	5. Chapter 5

**THIS IS THE REVISED VERSION OF THIS CHAPTER, BECAUSE I REALIZED THAT WHAT I HAD ORIGINALLY POSTED WAS CRAP. HOWEVER, IT WILL BE POSTED AS A ONE-SHOT.**

Me: Hi!

Audience: *throws tomatoes* *yelling verbal abuse*

Me: *ducks tomatoes* So, you're probably wondering what in the name of chocolate took me so long to update.

Spock: If you look at the update dates of her other fanfictions, you wouldn't be surprised.

Me: Yeah, I'm kinda afraid to update those...I think the characters might attack me...

Britain: WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?! I'M SICK OF WAITING FOR YOU TO FINISH THIS CHAPTER!

Me: ... *banishes Britain back to the story* Life got in the way of writing. Sorry. But on the plus side, I went to Comic Con, which was pretty cool. And I have a new idea for a story, which I'll tell you about after the chapter.

Spock: Without further ado...

* * *

Last time: _"Thank you for your time. Goodbye, Mr. Fudge." With that, Britain walked out. It was around ten p.m., and he had to be at the meeting around eight a.m. to get the spell prepared._

* * *

Britain was humming. He was _humming_. That was probably not good, as he never hummed. Never. So, when the other countries walked into the conference room-ranging from fifteen minutes early to five or so minutes late-they knew something was up. Their suspicions were confirmed when he said "Good morning!" too brightly.

_Crap, what craziness is he up to now?_ was the general consensus. "S'up, dude?" boomed America, who was-as usual-oblivious to the air of nervousness in the room.

Britain didn't even pretend to not know what America meant. "I have everything I need to perform the spell. There's just one thing left..." he trailed off.

"What's that?" America asked curiously.

"Um... If I could have everyone's attention, please?!" Britain called. He was ignored. "Hey, Germany, could you...?"

"Sure," Germany sighed. "EVERYONE SHUT UP! BRITAIN WANTS TO SAY SOMETHING!" he thundered. Everyone instantly quieted. Britain felt a slight twinge of jealousy...why didn't anyone listen to him? Why did they only listen when they were shouted at? But he brushed it off; he would have an opportunity to prove-once and for all-that magic was real, and then they would listen to him, like it or not.

"Er, yes, my spell is almost complete. I just need one thing from each of you." He paused briefly.

"Which is what, Britain-san?" Japan asked quietly.

Britain shifted his weight slightly before answering. "...Blood."

"WHAT?!" everyone shouted in unison, probably the only time in history they had ever all agreed on something.

"I need a small amount of blood from each of you, to take you back in time," he explained. "Just a pinprick, really. All it will do is...allow your bodies to adjust to the time period properly."

"Or you could call the Doctor," Laos (1) mumbled.

"I heard that, and I'd rather not, I was rather...rude to him the last time we met (2)."

"So what you're saying is that the Doctor is real?" Laos asked skeptically.

"Yes, can we please move on? I need some blood of whomever is going back in time with me, unless you want to be very sick, and believe me when I tell you that it is excruciating. It's rather like traveling with a vortex manipulator-it will make you feel sick. Very sick," Britain said.

"Vortex-" America began.

"I can explain it to you later in private, America-" France snickered- "Shut up, Frog! Honestly," Britain mumbled under his breath, "he's worse than Jack Harkness. Anyway," he said more loudly, "the last thing that I need is the blood, then we're ready to go. So. Who's good with a needle?"

"I'm good with a needle, but I'm not sure if I can take a blood sample," Hungary said. "I don't have any nursing experience."

Lithuania nudged Poland. "What?" Poland hissed.

Lithuania didn't say anything, but just gave him a Look that spoke more than a thousand words.

"Like, not cool, Lithy," Poland grumbled. He stepped forward. "I have, like, nursing experience," he volunteered reluctantly.

"Brilliant!" Britain said. "Poland will take a sample of anyone's blood who wants to go back. Who wants to go?"

America, France, Prussia, Germany, Italy by default, Japan (after hesitating slightly), Spain (who dragged Romano with him), and Sealand-who had snuck in. (Britain noticed him, but for the sake of keeping the peace, didn't say anything.) Britain took a deep breath. All the blood had been collected. He placed everyone who was going in a specific position and put the blood in the correct places in the pentagram.

"Santo Rita Meata Mater Ringo Jonah Tito Marlon Jack La Toya Janet Michael Dumbledora the Explorer! _Reverto Tempus_!"

The countries were enveloped in a bright light and vanished from the conference room. Somewhere in the past and a couple hundred miles away, all hell broke loose.

* * *

(1) Laos: It's a country in south-east Asia, according to my mom. She may or may not be lying.

(2) Britain being rude to the Doctor: It's my headcanon that Britain has yelled at the Doctor for different London invasions and such.

Me: Would anyone be interested in a Doctor Who version of _Romeo and Juliet_? We just finished it in English-finally finished the essay!-and I was struck with an idea for a 10th Doctor/Rose version. Interested? Let me know and I'll try to post it at some point. Anything to add, Spock?

Spock: Would you like to apologize for the first editon of this chapter?

Me: *looks sheepish* Well, a gigantic thank-you to **MyraBrown**, because to be honest, she shamed me-indirectly-into realizing that what I had written was utterly awful. So, apologies for anyone who read that version. It will, however, be posted as a one-shot alternate chapter for anyone interested.


End file.
